April 24, 2017

As if we are strangers...

Your hello was cold.

Your smile was vacant.

As if we no longer recognize one another.

To certain extend, I want to believe about miracle. It may happen, even if I am not sure of when and how, but I hope that I would meet upon a certain kind of a miracle.

Late afternoon tiptoed through the window of the living room. 

I was in turmoil.

Aren't my eyes painted with black shades? 

Aren't you see the visible scars?

I felt my self a little die either. Uneasy emotion marred my soul, practically the whole act. The air is no better, it smelled like a hassle for some reason. 

Waiting doesn't heal.

Time doesn't conceal.

The right incisively memory still persist like new.

And I have been fed up to chew.

April 22, 2017

credit to @ana_shalamberidze

I have been too familiar with this intersection to choose another way. I roamed the streets, covered with neon lights. All I had in mind was to walk aimlessly, curing the inflexibility, healing the consternation, cutting the harrowing yearning. Yet, I couldn’t bury all the reverie I keep for you on our last intersection.

Autumn has come to congeal my tears.

These calming cold in the beginning of autumn somehow made my heart a little at ease, the chill that would make my freezing hands comfortable inside a thick coat.  

I heard it’s better to wrap your aching ankle with ice. It blocks your nociceptive nerves. It cut the painful transmitter. And yes, I feel so. My heart slowly turned numb.

…

Clara settled on the wood bench, sipping on a cup of hot chocolate when sensing a shadow besides her, a man took a seat right beside her. “Isn’t it cold to stay out at this autumn?” a voice traveled to her ear.

She gave an automatic smiled as a familiar voice traveled to her ear signing that she had no longer needed to wait.

“Am I too late?” he broke the silence between them.

Clara shook her head and swept her black strand of hair to the back of her ear while trying to capture the color of his eyes that always radiated warmth, the main feature of his face that often caught her in daze.  

Clara often drowned on her own immensity of mind of how he came to barge into her life. When she thought deeper, he embraced her inflexible socializing ways and suffocated her with his friendly act. 

She was hesitated frequently but he succeeded to open her barriers and walk through the imperceptible girl. 

“Should we go now? But it’s drizzling...” he asked.

“It’s okay, These wouldn’t get us all drenched.” She said and got up to start the walk.

There was nothing too distinct in him. We walked with his cheap jokes that always kept me from bore, the same joy he always bring for companion, except for one…

“Clara.” He uttered my name clearly when I realized he wasn’t beside me but three steps behind.

“Yes?”

“I’ll stop here. I wouldn’t walk you home tomorrow and further.”

“Why?” her eyes wandered to the entire of his build that now seems vacant and cold. 

He turned over, refusing to answer her very question, attempting to walk away.

“No!” 

“Where are you going?”

His reticent steps left her, step by step, slowly, making clear distances. 

The drizzles grew awkwardly heavier bore him to another direction.

The world appeared lost for her and she continued walking through the rain. She gave in the weather as it was going worst as the skies went dark. The agonizing moment had now filled her every head corners.

A chorus of voice rose up. Afraid, confused, worry, flat-footed, these emotions she couldn’t hide. He broke the bricks she built. Her strongest and tall as she thought it was at all far from being broken down by the most impossible situation. 

The breaking of autumn air smelled like trouble leaving a permanent mark somewhere on her heart.

…

Today is just another day. I am walking with my own passing the intersection. I sent star-spies to ask how you were keeping and they say you are as warm, as alive, as when you walked away in the intersection.

Between the faint drizzle, where we stood under the traffic light just about to cross the road, without hesitation you let me walk alone to another side. Without telling me, so who do you think I am?

April 7 - 8, 2017

These was an unplanned short trip.

We booked the tickets and lodging online the night before going.

I had lecture an hour before going.

But we brought a trophy back home, yeay!

The nine floors building in Semarang, if you could see it closely, it's a beach out there. Great view isn't it?

In one of vintage corner in Kota Lama, Semarang.

I walked around before boarding the train to go back home. Such a soothing walks around.